Why this exists

I built this quiz after years of watching healing spaces — therapy, wellness culture, psychedelic work, even my own training — quietly reinforce the same patriarchal, colonial, capitalist patterns they claimed to be healing from. White healing spaces taught people to consume their way to wellness alone. What actually worked, almost every time, was something simpler and harder: other humans who actually cared, in community, not in a transaction.

I'm not from a culture with an unbroken lineage. I can't borrow the survival wisdom of communities who endured what mine didn't — and I won't pretend to. What I can do is build a tapestry of my own, openly, in support of and following the lead of the people whose knowledge this draws from, rather than extracting it.

Who taught me this

This work is shaped by — and accountable to — colleagues, teachers, and frameworks including: Molly Mitchell, Gary Smith, Raquel Savage, Yosenio Lewis, Dr. Yu Rock, Shadeen Francis, Afrosexology, Ruby Bouie Johnson, and Jimenekia Eborn. My colleagues in the AASECT community. The people doing trauma-informed kink work, and everyone who has called me in, called me out, and held me accountable along the way.

The actual vision

This quiz is the first piece of something larger: a decentralized, mutual-aid sex and dating ecosystem — not a dating app, not a matching algorithm. The long-term model: funds beyond what's needed to build this go into a decentralized fund supporting peer exchange and time-banked mutual aid, where labor and care are exchanged hour-for-hour, not by market value. Access isn't about meeting beauty standards — it's about vetting, education, accountability, and demonstrated care, centering the people most harmed by current sex and dating systems, including sex workers.